After my horseback riding experience, I spent some time thinking about how being in the flow of life can positively affect our lives.  We are calmer, more focused, more at peace with ourselves and the world.  We experience the ultimate flow when we are following our passion, doing work and other activities that we love.  I ask clients a couple of questions that are helpful for discovering their true passion and flow:

• What would you do, even if you weren’t getting paid for it?
• If you had all the money you could ever want, how would you spend your time?

Why are these questions important?  Because when you are doing what makes you happy and fulfilled, you will most easily find your flow.  You will be inspired to get up out of bed, excited about what the day may bring.

When I worked with a client recently on how life is so much easier and enjoyable when we are in our flow and not forcing things, the personal experience he came up with was drumming.  When he forced it, it was hard to play and didn’t sound as good; he said by letting go, he could finally feel the flow.

How does this relate to everyday life?  Once you know how it feels to be engaged in something effortlessly, you can cultivate that feeling at other times, as well.  Then, when something unexpected or unpleasant happens, you have a choice: you can either focus on what happened, all the bad details – stirring up and continuing to feed negative emotions, such as anger or regret – or you can acknowledge the sad, unfortunate or surprising situation, consider how you could respond in a productive way, and then refocus on whatever brings you back to center – to your sense of calm and flow.

I get into my flow, especially, in my coaching and when I’m doing other favorite activities like t’ai chi, cycling, walking, swimming, dancing and gardening. Without effort, my breathing becomes deep and regular, I am relaxed and my thoughts and movements come with ease.  By remembering that feeling at other times, I have learned how to bring on that state by focusing on my breath and my energy center in my body’s core.

Get Into Action
Think about an activity where you can get into your flow.  What is it about that activity that does it for you?  Can you recall that feeling you had when you were doing it with such ease?  What would it take for you to call up that feeling at other times?  Is it a certain way of breathing?  Is it the way you are moving?  Is it some sort of visualization that gets you into that flow?

Once you’ve pinpointed what puts you into your flow, practice bringing on that same feeling in everyday life – in your office, on a walk, or perhaps having a meal.  Once you’ve gotten the hang of this, you can begin using this technique to get into your flow in more stressful situations.  Have some fun with this – it can really make a difference in your day.